The previous generation has many gifts to pass along to the next, whether it be skills, stories or the general wisdom of living a full life. Their experiences are our bridge to the past, carrying a rich tapestry of family history that may otherwise be inaccessible. This wealth of knowledge can profoundly impact our understanding of who we are, where we come from, and even where we’re going.
Knowing your grandparents better is a beautiful way to connect with your family history and gain insights into their life experiences. Our most powerful tool in this quest for knowledge is asking questions.
Keep reading to learn some effective strategies for active listening, and dig into an array of thought-provoking questions and conversation-starters that may be useful in your journey of discovery.
An essential first step to any meaningful conversation is to learn what it means to listen actively.
Active listening involves hearing the words someone is saying and fully understanding their message, showing empathy and demonstrating that you are thoroughly engaged in the conversation.
If you’re looking for ways to be a more active listener with your grandparents, follow these tips:
When someone else is speaking, give them your full attention. Turn off distractions like cellphones, televisions or loud music to ensure you are dedicating your total concentration to the conversation at hand.
Ensure you maintain eye contact with the speaker and utilize non-verbal cues like nodding, smiling and gesturing to display that you are listening.
Positive body language encourages the speaker to continue, so if you feel the speaker is losing confidence in the conversation, try gesturing for them to continue.
While you may want to jump in with a point of your own, it’s essential to wait for the speaker to finish their thought before interjecting yours, especially when speaking to older individuals who may not have the pacing or reaction time they once had.
It can be challenging for some to remain focused while articulating their thoughts, so approach these conversations patiently.
Try empathizing with the speaker’s feelings and emotions without imposing your own. Put yourself in their shoes and acknowledge their experiences without judgment while avoiding reactive responses to what is being said.
Repeating or paraphrasing the words you’ve just heard is a great way to indicate to the speaker that you are paying attention to what they’re saying. Confirm your understanding regularly using phrases like “What I hear you saying is…” or “It sounds like you’re feeling…”
Finding the right words when you want to ask someone essential questions is a universal challenge. Striking a balance between curiosity and respect can be tricky, but even imperfect words can lead to profound and meaningful connections.
Below, we’ll review some categorized questions you can ask your grandparents to help facilitate significant conversations and build a stronger connection.
Traditions and Customs.
Our grandparents’ memories are often the only roadmap we have to our families’ pasts, so taking advantage of their time with us and asking questions to learn about their experiences is essential.
When having these conversations, remember to approach your grandparent with active listening, empathy and curiosity, and ensure you create a space where they feel comfortable sharing their stories and memories.
